When does one refer to a person as compassionate? And when do we refer to a person as caring? Do they point to the same, similar or different qualities? Increasingly, they tend to be used interchangeably. Indeed, ‘compassion’ is an oft-repeated word this pandemic season, in #L&D, #futureofwork, #leadership, #humancapital, #change, #mindset, #transformation, #organisationculture…

I care. What does it really mean? It seems to me that when I care, I want what is, I believe, the best for someone: I am aware of the needs of another, offer something I have or can access, avoid words and deeds that might be hurtful, and be available to act as sought, or simply be around should the need arise, even if not expressly requested. Quite often, this is the easier part. What’s hard is to be tough and demanding, to call out lies and self-deception, to draw the line and push back, to refuse or deny something—because we care.

Caring, then, includes in its fold sensitivity, kindness, generosity, non-intrusive companionship, and the willingness to be tough, to wound, to draw blood, if needed, to help heal. For the one who cares, there is evocation, a reaching out, a commitment to another, borne out of seeking or cementing a relationship, and often receiving affirmation, a booster shot for self-worth, and love in return.

I am compassionate. What does that mean? My parents care, some friends do too. Even colleagues. But are they compassionate? I have often heard it said that the Buddha was compassionate. In most images of him, he comes through as benign, serene, untouched and yet, present, beatific. Stories about him are simple and profound at the same time. He touched millions of lives. He taught compassion. He is, to my mind, its epitome. What can we learn from his precepts and practice of compassion?

I have come to believe that what distinguishes compassion from other forms and acts of caring is the ground from which it springs—a recognition that pain, suffering and sorrow is universal, that the eternal cycle of life and death, the dramatic grip of fear and desire—will cause loss and longing, pain and pleasure, occasions to freeze and flow, celebrate and mourn. This recognition helps to extend oneself to all mankind, indeed all living beings, rather than direct our caring towards a particular person or group. It does not discriminate and cast one as more favoured or deserving than another. There is complete acceptance—of the person(s) as they are, blemishes, shortcomings, history notwithstanding.

There is no friend or foe. A corollary is that the compassionate one is non-judgemental about the one who suffers or the origins of pain and suffering. The compassionate one is simultaneously in touch with the underlying unity of our humanness and the unique elements of context and people; action is discriminant in response while actively promoting the well-being of all.

This formulation of compassion comes from a half-hearted seeker, partially examined. I recall a few discussions with Raghu some years ago on the Buddha and compassion. I am also influenced by Ashok’s EUM framework, specifically the Universe of Duality and Simultaneity, that I must have touched sometime, however fleetingly, to leave an imprint.

What about organisations? Could we talk of a caring workplace?

A caring workplace can show up in relationships at work, and through what one might call systemic caring. Relationships among colleagues built on mutual respect, consideration and accommodation, sensitivity and empathy, all make for an ambience of mutual care. This can be significantly bolstered by an organisation’s policy framework that is sensitive and responsive to members’ needs and values, engages the human being rather than just the person’s capabilities, and actively promotes member health and well-being. In businesses, this may mean putting people over profits or a commitment to walk the tightrope between the two. Systemic caring, when deployed for some stated business purpose (attracting and retaining talent, for instance), will likely have a different flavour. The pragmatic use of caring will probably carry the taint of a grand and sophisticated ruse amenable to mutual extraction and bargain.

A compassionate organisation? I imagine a voluntary group or organisation imbued with humanistic values in the service of equity, justice, alleviation of pain and suffering and such other contributors to collective well-being.

What would a compassionate ‘for-profit’ organisation be like?